Embracing sadness the Brutiful

Lack of entries=lack of time to think. I managed to squeeze a few thoughts out recently so I'm back.)

My husband is often baffled at my penchant for sad stories, whether they be on television, in books, or real life/blogs. He'll never understand why I continue to watch Grey's Anatomy despite the fact that most weeks I've gone through half a box of Kleenex by the time it's done. Why I read books like "Sarah's Key" with plots that are utterly depressing. Why I can't tear myself away from blogs like this one that just rip out your heart.

Part of it is my need for reminders to cherish this life. Having had a near-death experience at 16, I am very aware that life can be cut short at any time. I can't help but wonder how much extra time I will be blessed with. Even so, it's easy to lose sight of that in the stress & busyness of life and so I appreciate the perspective that sadness lends me. A reminder to slow down and consider what really matters. I truly need that often.

So these frequent reminders keep me grateful. They also make me wonder about the "what-if's." I don't obsess over them, I don't live my life in fear. (Remember the stress & busyness part?) But I do sometimes do things like write notes to my children in case I die, or write down wishes for my funeral someday (which Matt promptly throws away--I guess he's not the type to embrace sadness).

Today I want to record a few of my favorite things with my kids in mind...because I am the type of person who when I love something, I want to tell someone about it. And maybe someday when I'm not around, they'll want to know more about the things I love(d).

To start, a fun one. I recently attended a concert at which these guys opened and I was mesmerized. This song "Charlie" kinda stole my heart and since I have two daughters, they better know it!

Next is this little gem. I've been listening to it a lot lately when I'm feeling a bit down. OK, so maybe it sounds a bit like a certain Sheryl Crow song, but the lyrics are such a comforting reminder that in the face of pain, we are always held by the One who loves us.

I also love this blog because there's a wonderful story of redemption here--God using someone who was utterly broken (as are we all) and using her to change people's lives in amazing ways. Plus I love how she invented the word "brutiful."

So maybe that's it--I immerse myself in sad stories because I love discovering the brutiful--the glimmers of hope and beauty in the midst of a brutal world.